#shinee fanfic

[lxvemaze]

shinee bf! headcanons

pairing: ot5!shinee x reader

tag: fluff!!

warnings: n/a

a/n: this is my first time writing in this format, so pls show this some love if you like it !!

more under the cut!

⚝onew

quietly attentive. he doesn't often tell you how much he loves you, but you can see it through his actions. NEVER lets you pay for dinner. he's always sneaky about it, but even if you put your card down, he subtly exchanges your card with his so you don't have to pay a single cent. he's always interested in what you're doing! even if you're just reading a book on the couch or doing your makeup, he's watching attentively and asking questions. he loves to listen to you talk about your day. as soon as you come home from work or from a day out with friends or family, he's asking you how your day went, what you did, if you had a good time, etc. he wants the details, too. so don't leave anything out! he just loves spending time with you. you could be doing the most mundane tasks, and he'd be looking at you with the most loving face. seriously, you could just be like, cleaning the fridge and he'd be staring at you like 🥹 overall, jinki is the most attentive and loving boyfriend you could ask for<3

⚝jonghyun

very loud about his love for you! words of affirmation are 100% how he shows his love in your relationship. you could have just woken up, crust in the corners of your eyes, your hair a mess, stinky morning breath, and creases on your face from laying on the pillow, and he'd just be like "you're so pretty :3" like, omfg. he loooves showing you off, but still likes to keep your relationship private. it's very conflicting for him. he loves taking you to dinner with his family! he loves to watch you talk with his mom while making food and drinking wine. i think he'd like to let you lead the way in the relationship, just so he knows that you two are always doing things that you love and are comfortable with. but!! if you don't feel like making the decisions and just want him to take you out and make the decisions, he's more than happy to do so! he just wants you to be happy :))) overall, jjong wants you to feel as happy, loved, and comfortable as possible in the relationship! (literally my dream man 😔✊️)

⚝key

kibum loooves going out and showing you off !! but unlike jonghyun, he doesn't gaf about keeping your relationship private- he wants everyone to know that you're his and he's yours! will spoil you to no end! you two could just be walking down the street, and you'd point out a cute skirt or something in a store window, and he'd immediately walk in to buy it for you. he treats valentines day like the most important day of the year. he'll pull out all the stops- breakfast in bed, gives you little presents throughout that day, takes you out for a FANCY dinner (probably reserved the whole restaurant for a few hours just so you two would be the only ones there), he even picks out your outfit and jewelry for the day so you two can match. speaking of which!! he loooves wearing matching outfits! not in a tacky, literally wearing the exact same clothes kind of way- but a "classy" matching. like, wearing the same color scheme. just something subtle as another way to show the world that you two are together. in conclusion: kibum is quite literally obsessed with you, and he wants EVERYONE to know it.

⚝minho

immediately obsessed with you from the beginning of the relationship! he is the single most husband-material man in the world, idc. will make you breakfast in bed as often as he can! even if you guys don't live together, he'll literally doordash a breakfast burrito or smth to your house just so he's sure you eat something in the morning. probably starts looking for rings just a few months into the relationship- but he won't tell you that bc he doesn't wanna freak you out. he's so sure that you're THE ONE, though. acts of service is 100% his love language. he just likes doing the little things for you! whether it's hanging up your jacket when you come home from work, washing the dishes, or learning how to make your favorite food, he's more than happy to do it! probably learns how to braid your hair! idk, i just feel like that's something he'd do. like, he'd wanna learn how to braid your hair so it's out of your face while you're sleeping</3. he loves talking about your future together! marriage, kids, retirement, all of it! he just loves to imagine your life together<3. minho is the guy that's in it for the long haul- he's the one you know you're gonna grow old with.

⚝taemin

he's a little weird!! but you love him, so it's okay!! just has the oddest little ways to show his love for you. like, i feel like he bites?? not hard, it's really more like, mouthing?? like, you guys will just be sitting on the couch watching tv, and he'll just gently bite your shoulder. and he'll stay there for a while, just like, holding your skin with his teeth. he likes to send you songs that remind him of you, but sometimes they're just so?????? like, he'll send you a song and be like "this came on shuffle and reminded me of you :3" and you're just sitting there confused like, bro this is literally "fireball" by pitbull??? silly stuff aside, i feel like he'd like to let you plan things!! not bc he doesn't want to- he just likes to let you take charge! you two will be deciding on where to go for dinner, and you'll be like "let's go here!" and he'll just be like, "okay :3" no arguing at all, he'll just go along with whatever you say! but he still likes to take care of you! like, he'll do little things like, zipping up your jacket, or holding the car door open for you, or bringing the blankets up to your chin while you're in bed so you don't get cold :((( also, kind of like the random biting thing, i feel like he just likes to hold you. like, you'll be standing at the stove cooking dinner, and he'll come up behind you and hug you TIGHT. like, you can barely breathe, but you know he just loves you so much, so let him squeeze the air out of you <3. taemin is the type of boyfriend that wants to be romantic, but he's just not really sure how! you two have your own way of going about things, and that makes you happy :)

a/n no.2: i went a little overboard with taemin, but i had a lot to say about that funky guy!! if you liked this, a like and reblog would be highly appreciated!! i love u guys. thanks for reading<333

[mykoreanlove]

Hiii!! Can I request you something for Choi Minho??? I've been obessed with him lately. So, maybe something cute like y/n works as a stylist for SHINee and Minho has a crush on her, something along the lines..Thank you!

It was supposed to be fluff but you know how this goes 🙊

Hope you like it! 🥰

DEPRIVED

„Y/N, can you moan for me?“

You choked on your red wine as you heard Minho‘s request. Hastily he got up and patted your back.

„Shit sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.“ His brown eyes looked into yours compassionately.

„You want me to moan for you? What the hell Minho?“

He laughed sweetly, already anticipating your reaction.

„I know how this sounds.“

You rolled your eyes at him judgmentally.

„Oh, do you?“

Minho took the wine glass out of your hand and grabbed your hand lovingly.

„Please, y/n. I haven’t been with a woman for so long. I’m so deprived of femininity, please help me out.“

You always wondered why Minho stayed single and lived a rather boring love life, after all he was in high demand.

Charming personality, banging hot body and cute face. Every girl would get on her knees in an instant, yet he chose to stay alone.

„Deprived huh? What do you want me to do exactly?“

His eyes lit up in anticipation, he had won you over easily.

Minho got up and walked over to the couch, sitting and spreading his legs like an alpha. His personality was shy with you, but his body wasn’t.

„Can you sit on me?“, he asked nervously.

You mustered him for a moment: strong, thick thighs spread apart that made room for you on his lap, muscular arms that waited to grab you and hungry eyes that wanted to devour you.

You had worked with him for ages, was this really a good idea? Your head weighed the pros and cons of overstepping your professional relationship with him but it was your body that made the ultimate decision.

The pull towards him was just too strong.

You got up and took a seat on his lap, feeling his strong thighs underneath you. You placed your delicate hands on his broad chest, supporting you like that.

„Is that okay?“, you asked shyly, not making eye contact with him.

„Perfect“, he whispered. „Even though one thing is missing…Look at me y/n.“

Your heart fluttered fast as his thumb grabbed your chin and tilted your head up, making you gaze into his eyes deeply.

„Hi“, he chuckled softly. You broke out in laughter, joining him in this serene moment. „Hi, Minho.“

„Does this feel weird?“

You shook your head truthfully. This felt far from weird, it actually felt kind of nice.

He smiled contentedly, glad that you felt the same way.

„What do you want me to do now?“

Minho cleared his throat and asked for kisses on his throat, something he absolutely adored.

You placed your soft lips on his throat, kissing it lightly before you started sucking on the thin skin, almost marking it.

„Cautious y/n, my stylist is going to kill me if I show up bruised“, he chuckled. „Oh, sorry“, you apologized and traced his jaw line instead, pampering him with sweet, little kisses. Minho‘s head fell back in pleasure, he had missed this so much. As your lips found his earlobe he shot up rapidly, holding his breath patiently.

„Can I touch you?“

You nodded and seconds after you felt his strong arms wrapped around you, his big hands sliding all over your body. You nibbled on his ear which elicited a deep growl from him. Fuck, this made you feel some things.

Minho‘s voice got even deeper as he complimented your kissing style. „I liked that, y/n. I really fucking liked that.“

Slowly, you whispered into his ear: „I know something that you like even more.“

You started circling your hips on him, feeling all of him now. You were right, he liked that even more.

„Fuck me, why are you so good at this“, he licked his lips, thinking about his next move.

„I’m good at everything, Min“, you smirked as you looked him in the eyes and grinded on him. His hands were glued to your ass, squeezing and massaging with full hands.

„Remember what you had asked of me?“

He nodded his head eagerly.

You leaned over and brushed his ear with your lips, sighing heavily into it. The grip on your ass got tighter as Minho tried to control himself. But you wanted to play, so you took things to the next level. Sighing turned into small whimpers which then turned into needy moans, all while circling your hips on his hard erection.

„You’re making me lose my mind, y/n“, he breathed out heavily.

„Isn’t this what you wanted?“

He nodded again, desperate for more of you.

„I want more though“, he stated.

You leaned back once more and mustered his face, his eyes were dying with need.

Need for you.

You leaned in and brushed his plush lips with yours, softly while whispering: „Not like this, Minho. Date me for real and we‘ll see.“

You got up from his lap and grabbed your things, making your way to the exit. He was unable to move, but called after you.

„Y/N, wait. What was this then?“

You turned around and winked at him playfully.

„A preview.“

[itstheoneshot]

Kinktober Day 18

Orgasm Denial / Edging - Taemin

!sub Taemin

You gag as you lower your head again, hollowing your cheeks to take him in deeper, obsessed with the way that his cock twitches when your nose brushes against the skin at the base, even more so with the noises that he makes. So easily won over, melting like ice on a hot day, just for you, he is your toy.

Gazing up at him through your lashes as you lift your head and lower again, you see how deeply red his cheeks are flushed, from the stimulation and the overwhelm of you rewarding him like this, you had told him he was extremely well behaved today. It was easy to you, loving nothing more than to give him all of you, putting in extra effort to make sure he felt incredible.

“Feels so good,” Taemin moans, his hips bucking reflexively in time with your own movements, “Ah, mmmh, thank you, thank you, thank you.”

He gets so… grateful, when he is close, making it so easy for you to know exactly when to stop before he finishes. He will never learn, he is unable to hold himself back, unable to hide his feelings from you. You let him get closer, knowing that he is only moments away before you suddenly pull off, smiling at him with a devilish grin as you watch him go through all of the emotions.

Confused, hurt, upset, in pain, his eyes are pleading and his lips are pouted as he glances down at his cock, seeing your hand firmly grasping the tip to stop him from being able to release. He becomes so dumb when it comes to anything sexual, as if the subspace that he falls into simultaneously stops his synapses from firing. He is helpless, knowing too well that he cannot win, in this situation he now has to wait until you are ready, he is yours to play with now.

“Such a good boy,” You praise him, slowly releasing your grip, and letting your hand drop down, still holding his cock, though this time from the base, “You know it feels best this way, you told me so yourself.”

Taemin bites his bottom lip, nodding apprehensively, flickers of the memory appear in his mind from the first time he admitted to you that he liked it when you had complete control over when he could finish. It was so long ago now, and this wasn’t something you did every time you were intimate, but you saved it for special occasions, and for a reward.

Today was one of those times, after you arrived home from a work trip to find the house spotless, the fridge stocked, and dinner prepared and ready for you.

The food could wait. Your desire for your partner could not. Instantly you are on him, making up for the few days apart, the lack of contact, both physical and emotional, mostly physical. The makeout session was hot and heavy as soon as it started, it is no wonder that you ended up here.

You return your focus to the present, with your hand wrapped around his shaft, you begin to move it, up and down, slowly at first to gear him up, though he is still hard, swollen and sore from the constant ebb and flow of his arousal, each attempt gets him closer to the edge before you stop him again. You have lost count by now, this has been going on for nearly an hour, and your own patience is beginning to wear thin.

“Taemin-ah,” You murmur, moving to lie beside him, kissing his swollen lips, “You can touch me too, you know?”

His headspace has him in a daze, and he looks confused for a moment before realising this was a call to action, his own hand moving down to where you want him, just as you hook a leg over his so that he has the space to reach between your thighs. You are dripping already, of course, turned on by your power over him, so aroused knowing that he will do whatever you tell him to, though all that you want right now is to get him over the edge when you do.

It is too late to expect more than his fingers, knowing that if you were to want more, as soon as he enters you with his cock he would finish. He is skilled enough that it is of no loss to you, with the way that you both know each other's bodies, it is never hard work for him to get you there. You still take it slow with him, aware that if you speed up too much, he will fall, and you will not be able to keep up, but you still feel his cock twitch with every movement, moaning into your mouth, muffled as your tongues collide. It is so messy at this point, Taemin has completely broken and fallen apart, struggling to focus on his fingers inside of you, while your grip on his cock tightens, matching the energy as you are so close to the edge.

Taemin pauses for a moment, and your stomach drops, wondering whether he is going to attempt to turn the tables, as your legs have just begun to shake, orgasm nearing, is he about to try and stop it? You grip even tighter, warning him that if he stops, so will you, and you watch his eyes widen, though it is hard to make out as you are so close together, and he resumes his actions.

“That’s better, baby,” You gasp, back arching as he gains enough energy and focus, “Come on, get me there, you want me to let you finish too, don’t you?”

He curls his fingers just slightly, “Please, come on, I can’t take it anymore.”

You laugh aloud, but are interrupted as without warning the build up happens, breath halting in your throat, choked as the wave of pleasure washes over you, unable to articulate just how good it feels, forever surprised that he can do so much with just his dainty fingers, maybe it is the years of piano, or the eloquent dance he can do, but you don’t complain.

“Come for me,” You manage to order him, “Let go, Taemin, come for me, baby.”

With permission, finally, he does. Hard, fast, his load is powerful, thick and hot in bursts all the way up your chest. He is done, ready to faint, unmoving once he pulls his fingers from you, and you are both left breathless, exhausted, and still just as obsessed.

———

Kinktober 2024 Masterlist

[lovetaroandtaemin]

Comfort in Unexpected Places

Choi Minho x Reader

Word Count: 4,339

Genre: Smut/Fluff/A bit of angst

Rating: Explicit, MINORS DNI!

Summary: When Y/N recieves a series of messages from her boyfriend Jisung's best friend confirming her suspicions that he's been cheating on her, she goes to his house to confront him. Instead of being greeted by her boyfriend, however, she's greeted by his dad, Minho. When she tells Minho what happened, he decides that he's willing to do anything to make her feel better.

Warnings: INFIDELITY, Bf's dad!Minho, age gap (Minho is written to be in his mid 40s and Reader is written to be in her early 20s), unprotected sex, creampie, slight dom/sub themes, oral (f receiving) use of the title "sir," praise kink, Reader and Jisung have an incredibly toxic relationship, attempted gaslighting, implied round 2. If you think I missed a warning, please let me know!

Tags: @yoonguurt, @kwanisms

A/N: The dynamic between Reader and Jisung is heavily inspired by F.U. by Little Mix. If you haven't listened to it, I definitely recommend checking it out!

Fic is under the cut.

When you saw that you had a new Instagram dm, you had no reason to expect it to be anything other than your friends sharing a meme or your boyfriend sending you a cute post that made him think of you. The message was incredibly different from your expectations, however.

You opened the message and saw a collection of pictures sent by Jeno, one of Jisung’s friends. Each one showed messages where your boyfriend told Jeno about various times that he’d cheated on you with Minjeong, one of their other friends. It honestly would have hurt less if he’d been with anyone else, but you’d told Jisung countless times about your concerns regarding his excessive closeness with Minjeong specifically. Each time you asked him about his closeness to her, however, Jisung would call you crazy before telling you that he loved you and promising that nothing was going on between them.

As you could now see, however, every single one of those promises had been bullshit. You’d been suspicious for a while, but now you had the proof right in front of you. As you read the messages, you started to feel sick to your stomach, and you didn’t know if crying until you couldn’t breathe or just killing Jisung sounded more appealing. Before you did anything else, however, you sent Jeno a message that said, “Thanks for telling me. I had a feeling, but it’s nice to know for sure.”

“It’s no problem,” he replied. “I just thought you deserved to know.”

You closed Instagram, and that was when the tears started to fall. You loved Jisung more than you’d ever loved a romantic partner before, so finding out that he’d betrayed you was devastating. Sure, he had his faults, but you still loved him. You even defended him every time your friends expressed their concerns due to his reputation for being a bit of a player. You knew all about the rumors, but when he asked you out, you really wanted to believe that he’d changed. Now, of course, you knew that he really hadn’t.

Once you didn’t have any tears left to cry, you decided that it was time to confront Jisung. As you got ready to leave, however, you couldn’t help but worry that you wouldn’t be able to do it. After all, you’d tried to end your relationship before. Every time, though, all he had to do to get you to change your mind was bat his pretty eyelashes, tell you that he was sorry, and kiss you with those soft lips that just drove you crazy. It was the same routine you’d been through with him a hundred times before. This time, however, you were determined to stand your ground, despite your worries and his manipulative tendencies. You were going to tell him that the two of you were done and mean it this time.

Once you were certain that you were ready, you drove to Jisung’s house and knocked on the door. You were surprised, however, to see his dad open the door instead. You stood frozen for a minute, unsure of what to say to him. You hadn’t really spoken to Mr. Choi much outside of family events that Jisung brought you along to. The biggest reason for that was the fact that you found him to be incredibly intimidating. You would have been lying if you’d said that he wasn’t also incredibly hot, though. He was significantly taller than you, with dark eyes that seemed to stare right into your soul every time he looked at you and a voice that you were certain should have belonged to an angel instead of a human. God, you really needed to get your thoughts under control. He was your boyfriend’s dad, for fuck’s sake.

In an attempt to shake the inappropriate thoughts, you asked, “Hi, Mr. Choi. Is Jisung here?”

“No, sorry. He went out with Minjeong earlier,” he said with a slight frown. “He always seems to be out with her, anymore.” You were pretty sure that you weren’t supposed to hear the last part, though, so you ignored it.

“I figured as much,” you responded, your voice starting to break.

“Is everything ok, (Y/N)?”

“Everything is fine, Mr. Choi. Thank you.”

“You can call me Minho, you know.”

You hesitated before you said, “Ok. In that case, thank you for asking, Minho, but everything is fine.”

“(Y/N), forgive me for saying this, but it really doesn’t seem like everything is fine. You sound like you’re trying not to cry. Why don’t you tell me what happened?”

Something about the softness in Minho’s voice made your walls crumble in an instant, and before you knew it, you were crying again. In between sobs, you told him about everything, from the screenshots to the number of times you’d tried to leave before and changed your mind, though you didn’t know how much he could understand. Once you calmed down a bit, you just sighed and said, “I can’t do it anymore. I love him, but he’s hurt me too many times.”

Seeing you so distressed because of his son devastated Minho. He’d thought that he raised Jisung better than that, but now he was starting to doubt himself. He would have a talk with Jisung about how he treated you another time, though. Right now, his priority was comforting you. When he was sure you were done talking, he pulled you into a hug and said, “Why don’t you come in? I could make you some tea, and we could talk a bit more. It might help.”

You were quiet for a minute while you thought about whether you should accept Minho’s offer. Initially, you wondered if Jisung would be weirded out by you hanging out with his dad without him. Then, you remembered that the entire reason you’d gone to his house was to tell him off for cheating on you, and suddenly you didn’t give a shit about how he would feel about it anymore. Without any further hesitation, you said, “That sounds wonderful. Thank you.”

“It’s no problem at all,” he said as he opened the door the rest of the way.

You’d been in Jisung’s house before, but this time, you felt significantly different. Whether it was the reason you were there or the fact that you were there without Jisung, you weren’t entirely sure. Either way, though, walking through the door felt strange. As you entered the living room, you couldn’t help but think that this was probably the last time that you would be there. The thought was disappointing if you were being honest with yourself. Since you had started dating Jisung, you’d felt so at ease every time you were in his house.

You were snapped out of your thoughts by Minho asking you if you still wanted some tea. You hesitated for a minute before you said, “No thank you. I’d just like to talk if that’s ok.”

“That’s perfectly fine. If you change your mind, just let me know.”

“Thank you.”

The room was quiet for a minute before Minho asked, “So, you said that you found out because someone sent you screenshots?”

“Yeah. Jeno sent me a message on Instagram with screenshots of messages that Jisung had sent him about hooking up with Minjeong.”

“I’m sorry that he did that to you, and I’m sorry that you found out the way you did.”

“There’s no reason for you to apologize. It’s not like you told him to do it,” you said with a laugh.

Minho knew that it was wrong, but when he saw you start to smile, he couldn’t help but think that you were absolutely beautiful. Hearing your laugh put a smile on his face and butterflies in his stomach, which was something he hadn’t experienced since Jisung’s mom had divorced him a few years prior. While he was embarrassed that he was feeling attracted to you, he also had to admit that it was nice to have those kinds of feelings for someone again.

The two of you continued to talk, and you found that you felt significantly better. Something about the gentle way that Minho spoke to you while he comforted you gave you the confidence that you needed to finally end your relationship with Jisung for good. Before you did, though, you decided that you wanted to have a bit of fun as revenge. Without giving yourself time to think about whether it was a good idea, you moved closer to Minho and kissed him.

You knew that what you were doing was wrong, but you loved the feeling of Minho’s lips on yours. Sure, part of the excitement you were feeling was because you were doing something you weren’t supposed to, but that wasn’t the only reason for your lack of care. As his lips moved against yours, you couldn’t help but think that Minho was a much better kisser than Jisung, probably because he had far more experience.

Sooner or later, however, you did pull away to catch your breath. When you did, though, you saw a look that you could only describe as utter shock on Minho’s face. That was when you really processed what you’d done, and you felt terrible. As the panic started to set in, you said, “I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have done that. It was-”

“Amazing?”

“I mean, yeah, but it was also wrong. I’m sorry, I have to go.”

The last thing that you wanted to do was leave, but you knew that it was probably for the best. So, you stood up to grab your purse. Before you could get too far, though, Minho called out, ��Wait.” You turned to face him, and he continued, “I don’t want you to go. If you want to go, then I won’t keep you, but you don’t have to.”

When you heard Minho say that he didn’t want you to go, a wave of relief washed over you. You really didn’t want this to be over yet, so you said, “I’ll stay, then.”

You sat back down on the couch, and before you could think about the consequences for too long, you kissed Minho again. Somehow, this time was even more exhilarating than the last. You never wanted it to end, and if the soft groan that slipped out as his lips moved against yours was any indication, neither did Minho.

After a few minutes, Minho deepened the kiss, and you tangled your hands in his hair as a familiar feeling of need started to build between your legs. You wanted to be ashamed of how little time it took for you to start thinking about fucking him, but you were too horny to care. It had been too long since the last time you’d gotten fucked, and now you were determined to change that. The tension between you had grown to be too much for you to bear, so you pulled away just enough to whisper, “I want you. Please?”

Minho smiled and asked, “What do you want, sweetheart?” with a teasing tone in his voice. You went quiet, and he added, “Come on, baby. If you don’t tell me what you want, I can’t give it to you.”

“Just want you to touch me. Please?”

Minho pretended to think for a minute before he started to kiss your neck, biting the skin occasionally. You moaned softly at the sensation, and it only worsened the tent that had started to form in his pants. He desperately wanted to be inside you, but he was more than willing to wait for that if it meant that he could watch you squirm at the slightest touch. It was a little bit mean, sure, but he just thought you were so cute.

Once Minho was satisfied with the patchwork of hickeys that he’d left on your neck, he pulled away just long enough to pull your shirt over your head. Once he had your shirt off and your bra undone, he gave your breasts the same treatment that he’d given your neck. You wanted to be upset that he was teasing you so much, but you really couldn’t find it in you. Especially when the way he touched you already felt so good.

Minho continued to kiss his way down your body until he found a comfortable position in between your legs. Before he went any further, however, he looked up at you and asked, “Are you sure you want this, sweetheart?”

“I’m sure. I want you.”

“Lift your hips up, angel.” You did as you were told, and Minho made quick work of removing your pants and underwear. When he finally saw your pussy, he groaned and whispered, “Fuck. So pretty.”

You whined softly, suddenly feeling shy as you realized that Minho was still fully clothed. Any shyness you were feeling was quickly forgotten, however, when he started to gently suck on your clit. The sensation drove you crazy, and without really thinking about it, you moaned loudly and said, “More, sir. Please.”

Hearing you call him “sir” made something snap in Minho’s brain. Before you knew what was happening, he started sucking faster and inserted two fingers into your pussy. You continued to moan loudly as Minho fucked you with his fingers, and every noise that left your lips drove the man insane. He could have said that he didn’t love the way you tasted on his tongue, but that would have been a complete lie. As much as he loved tasting you, though, he also desperately wanted his cock inside of you.

“Fuck! It feels so good, sir,” you moaned.

“I know, baby. You’re doing such a good job for me. Can’t wait to feel this beautiful pussy around my cock.”

“Please, sir. I want you to fuck me.”

“I promise I will, baby, but I want you to cum on my fingers first. Can you do that for me, baby?” You nodded vigorously, desperate to please Minho.

It didn’t take long at all for the knot in your stomach to start to tighten, which was how you knew that you would soon be giving Minho exactly what he wanted. You wanted to warn him that you were close, but you couldn’t have gotten the words out in time if you’d tried. You came undone around his fingers and tongue with a loud moan of his name, and he’d never wanted to fuck another person more than he wanted to fuck you in that moment.

Once you came down from your high, Minho carefully stood up and kissed you once again, allowing you to taste yourself on his tongue. You hated to admit it, but you were quickly getting addicted to the feeling of Minho’s lips on yours. You were certain that you only felt this way because he’d just given you the best head you’d ever had, but you were really considering a more serious relationship with Minho. That would have to happen after you officially broke up with Jisung, though.

Before you could think about it much longer, though, Minho pulled away from the kiss and asked, “Would you like to take this to my room?”

Still in a bit of a daze, you nodded and quietly said, “Sounds good.”

“Follow me, sweetheart.”

It was silly, but you couldn’t help but feel giddy every time Minho called you “sweetheart.” It had to be the way he said it, considering you’d never really liked the nickname much before. Honestly, though, most things sounded better when he said them. At this point, you were pretty sure that he could read the dictionary aloud and you would get butterflies in your stomach.

Before you could think about your newfound love for Minho’s voice much more, though, you found yourself in his bedroom. You’d never been in this particular room of the house before, but you had to say that it felt a lot cozier than Jisung’s room. The walls were painted a warm brown, and the soft lighting made you feel right at home. It was too soon to say with any certainty, but you were pretty sure that you could get used to spending time in Minho’s room.

You wanted to say something, but before you could, Minho pinned you to his bed and started to rub his clothed erection against your bare pussy. You moaned louder than you intended to, and you begged, “Please, sir. Want you inside me.”

“Fuck, baby. Need you so bad.”

Minho stood up just long enough to rid himself of his clothes before he was back on top of you. As you watched him strip, the only thing you could think about was how badly you wanted him inside you. You wanted to beg him again to just fuck you already, but before you had the chance, you felt him carefully aligning his tip with your entrance. He gave you one more look to confirm that you wanted him as badly as he wanted you, and when you nodded, that was all he needed to slowly push his hips forward.

When you finally felt Minho inside of you, the only thing you could do was wrap your arms around his neck and moan. He was bigger than you were used to, and you knew that it would take you longer than usual to adjust, but you also knew that you could take him. Once he checked in with you again to make sure that you were ok, he slowly started to move. It hurt just a little bit at first, but the pain quickly turned to pure pleasure as you adjusted to the sensation.

“You’re taking me so well, baby. It’s like this pussy was made for me.” You moved your arms from around Minho’s neck and covered your face, feeling shy as a result of the way that he spoke to you. He quickly moved your hands away from your face, however, and said, “Don’t get all shy on me now, princess. Let me see you.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Good girl.”

Something about hearing Minho call you a good girl just melted your brain. It was like you couldn’t think about anything except him, and all you wanted was to make him proud of you. If you could think straight, you’d probably be embarrassed at the state that your boyfriend’s father had you in. In the moment, though, you loved it and only wanted more.

“Harder, sir. Please?” you begged, digging your nails into his back as he fucked you.

“Fuck. You’re driving me crazy, sweetheart,” Minho said with a groan as he started to pound into you faster.

The moans and whines that left your mouth as Minho fucked you were like music to his ears. It was embarrassing to admit it, but he knew that he wasn’t going to last much longer, especially when he saw the way your tits bounced as he fucked you. He didn’t really care about that, though. As long as he got to see you like this again, he was ok with however his body chose to respond to you.

Within minutes, Minho felt his release start to approach, just like he knew it would. With a moan he said, “Fuck, baby, I’m close. Where do you want it?”

“Inside, want you to fill me up,” you cried out, looking up at him with tears starting to form in your eyes.

Seconds later, Minho stilled inside of you, a string of expletives leaving his mouth as his orgasm hit him like a truck. As he continued to fuck you through his release, you started to get desperate to reach your own. You tried to bring a hand down to your clit to speed up the process, but before you could, Minho moved it and brought his own hand to where your bodies were connected.

Once Minho started to rub your clit, it didn’t take long for you to feel yourself getting closer to the release that you wanted so badly. You wanted to give him a heads up that you were close, you really did. When you opened your mouth, however, a loud moan came out instead, and your entire body tensed as you rode out your second orgasm of the day.

As Minho coaxed you through your second orgasm at his hands, he couldn’t help but think once again that he really wanted to see you like this more often. Before that conversation could happen, though, he made a point to take good care of you. After he carefully pulled out, he helped you to clean up and get dressed. Once you were clothed and comfortable, he got himself dressed again, and he carefully climbed into bed with you. He then found a comfortable position and pulled you close, whispering sweet nothings into your ear as you relaxed into his hold.

You weren’t entirely sure how long the two of you stayed in bed together, but you had to admit that you really liked being held by Minho. After a while, though, you started to get a bit restless. He seemed to notice, and asked, “Do you want to go do something else?” You nodded, and he added, “How about we go to the kitchen? I could cook you something, if you want.”

“That sounds great. Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it, baby.”

Hearing Minho continue to call you “baby” even after the two of you stopped having sex made your heart do somersaults in your chest. You were embarrassed to admit it, but you really wanted to spend more time with him. Sure, you absolutely wanted to have sex with him again, but it was more than that, too. He had the kind of calming presence that you craved, and he was so much nicer to you than Jisung had ever been. You hated to admit it, but you were falling for your soon-to-be ex’s dad.

The two of you made your way to the kitchen, talking about whatever came to mind. While you sat down at the table, Minho got to work making the two of you scrambled eggs with toast and bacon. While he cooked, you continued to talk and get to know each other better. In the span of only a few minutes, however, the conversation quickly devolved into talking shit about Jisung.

“Hold on. How many times have you tried to break up with him?” Minho asked.

“Four.”

“And how long have you been together?”

“A year and a half.”

“You should have said something sooner, baby.”

“I didn’t think it was an option,” you mumbled.

Minho felt absolutely terrible for not seeing the way Jisung treated you sooner, but he was relieved that he could still be there for you in the end. He thought that you were such a sweet girl, and you deserved so much better than the way that his son had treated you. As the two of you continued to talk, he found himself thinking that he could probably treat you much better. Whether you wanted him to do that, though, was up in the air, at least from his perspective.

Minho sat down with you to eat, and you quickly found that the more you spoke to him, the more certain you were that you wanted more than a sexual relationship. He made you laugh in a way that you weren’t used to, and you loved it. Plus, his responses when you spoke showed that he really cared about what you had to say. You felt loved, respected, and seen in a way that you never did with your soon-to-be ex.

The two of you were so lost in your conversation, you didn’t even notice that someone else had come into the house until you heard Jisung ask, “What are you doing here, baby?”

Hearing the nickname that sounded so sweet leaving Minho’s lips come from Jisung instead left a sour taste in your mouth. Before you could think better of it, you said, “Don’t call me that, asshole.”

“Woah, what the fuck did I do?”

“You’ve been cheating on me with Minjeong!”

Jisung’s face went pale as the realization that you knew hit him, but he quickly regained his composure and said, “I don’t know what you’re talking about, princess. She’s just a friend, we’ve been over this.”

“Oh really? Then what’s this?” you asked, opening your phone and showing him the screenshots that Jeno had sent you. Jisung immediately went quiet, knowing that he’d been caught. “We’re done, Ji.”

“Whatever, good luck finding somebody better than me.”

Before you could even think to stop yourself, you said, “I already did,” turning to smile at Minho.

Jisung quickly grabbed a bag that had been sitting on the counter and started to walk away, calling out that he was spending the night at Minjeong’s apartment. He then immediately got into his car and left, not wanting to think about what your words or the way you’d looked at his dad meant. Once he was gone, you immediately started laughing. Hearing your laugh made Minho smile, and before he could stop himself, he asked, “So, you already found someone?” with a teasing tone in his voice.

Your eyes went wide as you remembered what you said to Jisung, and you started to say, “Well, I mean-”

“I really hope that you meant me, otherwise I think that things might get a little bit awkward.”

You couldn’t help but start to laugh again. Once you caught your breath, though, you stood up, marched to where Minho was sitting, and kissed him. He immediately deepened the kiss, and a soft moan slipped out. He pulled away just long enough to say, “Fuck, baby. You’re gonna be the death of me,” before kissing you again, this time grabbing your ass as he did.

It was going to be a very long night for you, but you didn’t care. You wanted Minho, and you loved that he wanted you, too.

Thank you so much for reading! If you liked this one, please like and reblog! If you'd like to read more of my work, you can find my masterlist here. If you wanna see what else I have in the works, my upcoming works list is here. If none of that catches your attention, or there's something specific that you want to see, send a request via my asks or dms! If you want to be tagged in my new fics, you can leave a comment on any of my posts, send an ask, or send a dm with the username that you'd like tagged!

Thank you again for reading. I hope you have a wonderful day!

[imaginidol]

Taemin: Stars Under the Rain

“Taemin!” You hissed at the giggling boy as he practically jogged away from you with your shared umbrella, leaving you to be slowly soaked under the evening rain’s mist.

“You menace,” you whisper, pulling at his ear once you’ve caught up to him for the umpteenth time. “If I have to say your name one more time, someone’s gonna recognize you and the rest is history!”

Taemin only giggled some more and looked around the street at the walking pedestrians around you.

“What if a reporter hears us? Me with you? How funny do you think the headlines will be?”

“Taemin, that’s not funny!” You can’t help but stifle a short laugh at the ridiculousness of the boy in front of you.

“Fine, how about you hold the umbrella now?” He offers you the bright green umbrella along with a sheepish grin.

“Wow, thanks, Tae,” you roll your eyes at the realization that the only reason he returned the umbrella was because evidently, the mist had suddenly stopped.

He giggles again and pulls his hoodie over his head.

“Okay, okay,” he smiled, offering you his hand. “I’ll be good now.”

You pinched his arm before generously accepting his hand, wrapping your cool fingers around his.

While he was a bit of a menace to be around, you appreciated and loved the way Taemin would turn into a completely comfortable and playful version of himself when he was with you. There weren’t too many people he would show this side to.

“Look,” he says, stopping shortly before a line of street-way trees decorated with holiday lights.

You look up to see where his eyes have landed. You’re taken aback by the breathtaking sight of brightly-lit trees. While you always knew the city decorated their trees for the holidays, you had never actually stopped to admire the work put into the heavenly sight and how beautifully it complemented the dark sky at night.

“Wanna know what I think of these trees?” He looks at you quietly.

“Tell me what you think,” you reply.

“I really like how each bulb, regardless of its shape or size, is very pretty on its own. It’ll light up the dark pretty well. But I do prefer how they all complement each other when they’re all together, different shapes and different sizes. They look like cosmos when they’re all together.”

“I like that thought,” you say, admiring the twinkling lights all around you both. “Do you see those star-shaped lights, Tae? I think of you as one of those, in a sense.”

“Is it because I’m an artist and being a ‘star’ is my career?” He smiles.

“That’s too literal, Tae. I mean like… you’re very admirable in your own way. Inside and outside of your career. You work hard for what you give, you give your best when someone asks for your advice. You have people all around you that support you and help you succeed well. It makes you stand out like one of these star-lights. And if you put you and your supporters together… you all become a big, lit-up beautiful tree. You give inspiration to many in more ways than one.”

Taemin was quiet for a while, soaking in your calming words. The corners of his lips would curl to the tiniest of smiles when he thought of you at times like these.

“You know,” he says after a while, “I appreciate the way you see me for me, in and out of my career. But you’re missing something in your analogy.”

“What am I missing?”

“While it may be a beautifully lit-up tree that I’ve cultivated over my life, it takes just one precious person to notice it all and truly appreciate its existence. You see me and you appreciate me, my supporters, my life when the lights are turned off, my life when I’m shining at my brightest. I appreciate having you be that person. You make me feel very… seen.”

Your cheeks redden warmly and you can’t help but pull your boyfriend’s face close to plant a sweet kiss against his cheek, to which he smiles and returns one against your lips.

One, two, four little kisses later, the mist of rain is back. This time, you have the upper-hand with holding the umbrella. You realize this and immediately jog away from Taemin, leaving him in a heap of shock and giggles as he runs calling after you, the rain mist hitting his face and yours as you both briskly ran away under the brightly shining holiday trees.

[proudahgase-exol]

Boyfriend random text/social media with bf!Choi Minho

[xotaemintol]

Hello, can u do a headcanon: Relationship habits with Taemin

thanks<3

OFC!!

Now, all of this is really just based off of very small things I’ve seen him do in lives and stuff and also his MBTI (we’re both INFP’s btw lolololol) so if it doesn’t feel very accurate then I’ll be pleased to make changes and make it however you want or feel would be more accurate to the unhinged man himself, anywaaaays here you go!!

FLUFFY FLUFF no pronouns used, no gender implied!!

!!SFW!!

Taemin has a habit of making you try anything he's eating, even if it's bad.

-He's the type to try new things often, and he wants you to try them too so he'll literally force you to eat it even if he knows you won't like it

-"Just try it!" "C'mon! Just a little bite!"

-eventually you'll give in and try it after five minutes of him prying, and just when you think he won't do it again, he asks you to try the drink too

-he accidentally bought a veggie smoothie when he was out and when he tasted it he literally gagged and was like "baby, try this!" You said no but he literally whined and kept asking until you finally drank it, and surprisingly it was delicious

-when he cooks he always waits for you to try it first, he loves seeing your reactions when he makes something that tastes good

He says things that sound questionable all the time and you think he does it just because he finds it funny

-Minho once came over without a warning before and you had both just woken up, he saw you both coming out of Taemin's room looking like you got hit by a tornado and when he asked what happened, Taemin said: "we had a long night."

-When you were celebrating your anniversary he gave a small speech and in it he said: "I'm so happy to spend my life with you, even after everything you have done, I couldn't be happier with everyone else." Needless to say, it raised a few brows and he had to explain that he just meant all the good things you've done for him

-he accidentally made it seem like you were getting married once when he was trying to explain that you were moving in with him and Minho (not knowing) sent a four thousand dollar engagement gift to congratulate you

He does this thing where he'll pet your head but super aggressively

-he usually does this to Kkoong and Ddaeng, but he also does it to you now too

-he'll randomly pet the two adorable cats and then he'll turn to you and basically tackle you to aggressively pet your head while calling you cute over and over again and kissing your entire face

-you had to run from him once because he was trying to pet your head after you had just got your hair done, he caught you anyways and made sure to be extra aggressive and really hammer in just how adorable you are

-to put it simply, he has extreme cuteness aggression towards you so he squeezes you face often, pinches your cheeks, hugs you so tight you might pop, and will straight up tackle you because he thinks you are just so cute

He takes ages to respond to messages when he's out, even if he's not busy, he can take hours to respond

-once you texted him asking if he was eating dinner before coming back home so you'd know if you needed to cook for two or not but he never answered and because you didn't know if he was eating already or not, you cooked two full meals...he had already eaten...

-he may take hours to respond but when he does text you he'll send like 50 texts and when you don't respond right away he'll get offended

-'why aren't you responding to my texts? Are you busy?' 'Didn't you miss me??? What's taking you so long?? Helllooooooo???'

-he'll get super clingy when you take too long to respond to him, and if he gets home before you do he'll be upset the rest of the night until you spoil him with attention

He stays up late and watches Kdramas or Anime for hours and will get so immersed in it that he'll forget you went to bed and will yell and scream when he gets excited

-you catch him almost every night watching something different and have to remind him to go to bed so he isn't tired in the morning

-when he watched Tokyo Ghoul he screamed during the last episode because he was so excited and woke you up, you told him to at least be quieter and expected him to come to bed soon, but instead, he stayed up till morning and then passed out on the couch with a blanket 

-once you fell asleep on the couch with him while watching a movie and he accidentally woke you up with his cheering

You don't argue often, but when you do he can't be serious

-he smiles and laughs in the middle of small arguments, he'll be grinning the entire time and it's not because he doesn't take the situation serious, it's just because he doesn't even get why you're fighting anyways

-he laughed when you were arguing about getting a third cat and you couldn't even take the argument serious anymore

-even when arguing he finds you so cute, he'll literally drop the whole conversation to attack you with affection

Is such a cat and plant dad that when he's upset with you he'll go and talk to them about what made him upset

-he sits in the living room sometimes and talks to them about you in general, but when he's upset he'll sulk and grumble to the plants about you

-'can you believe that? I can't either'

-even when he's not upset he still talks to them about you

-he's so dramatic he once cried to the plants saying that you were going to divorce him and take the kids, this happens whenever he has to suddenly cancel dinner plans or whenever you get upset at him for keeping you up or for buying expensive cat toys

He may take hours to respond but he'll send long video logs of his day to show you how his day has been going

-when he's filming or traveling he makes super long videos in that hour long wait of a response, he'll talk to you through the videos and ask you about your day and ask if you missed him or what you ate

[cloudytaemin]

taemin as ur boyfriend <3

just some 2 am taemin thoughts, enjoy. damn hes sexy in that photo though aughhhh

bullet point syle since i am way too tired to write something out, sorry y/n-nies :[

taemin's home after ten too many days of working, a sigh escaping him as he makes his way to the bedroom

you already knew hed be exhausted so you started the bath and threw in some salts and oils that you knew he liked

you peck him on the cheek and he hugs you tightly

he wants to kiss you deeper but knows that you arent expecting it so he waits

you look up at him and tell him about the bath you prepared and he grins

of course, he's taemin, so once you get into the bathroom he starts to strip and asks you to join him

hes the type to let you sit on his cock in the bath while he pretends to be unaffected by how dangerously hot he thinks you are

once you slip in on the other side of the bath he frowns and tells you to come sit with him

so of course he pulls you between his legs on his side of the bath

and starts kissing down your neck, nibbling on your skin

you can't reach his cock so you move your hips back and forth to get him aroused, but the joke is on you

because taemin had been growing since he asked you to get in with him

and once he saw you it was game over for him, he needed it then and there and he knew it

his hand reaches forward and he runs his fingers up and down your folds, he knows exactly what he's doing

his thumb finds its way onto your clit where he rubs it back and forth quickly, and your hips buck in return

he tells you to turn around and you quickly oblige, feeling his cock rub against your heat in the water of the tub

you raise yourself up to take him in

but you dont realize that despite how tired he is he really cant control himself when it comes to you

so of course he's going to fuck you like he always does

long and hard, hes going to make you squirt around him until you feel like you cant anymore

if anyone knows how many rounds you can go its him

hell make you feel like you never want today to end

and hes such a slut for your lips

not to say you arent for his

but hes addicted to kissing, its all he ever does, even when hes moaning loud enough for the floor below him to hear he'll have his lips locked on yours because he can never get enough

but not to mention the way his muscles tense while hes fucking into you

you could swear they get even better

and his back while youre running your hands all over him

the waves and taut feeling of his back

those damned dancer muscles making an impression on you

once he finally thinks hes exhausted enough

and the bath water is starting to get dirty

hell wash himself, and then you, because what kind of man would he be if he made you wash up yourself after he used you like a toy

and taemins such a soft boy so after he fucks you until you feel like moving is impossible hell dress you in a pair of his sweatpants

and one of his favorite shirts, maybe he'd even let you wear his boxers to bed instead of pants

but no matter what he's end up sticking his hands under them anyway to feel your bare skin

he swears he couldnt sleep without it

even though he does every day he's away for preparing for comebacks

even if hes gone at one am hed make sure to come home at least once to check on you while you were asleep

just to see your face because he missed you

and sometimes he wakes you up to give you some kisses (even if it evolved into more most of the time)

always coming back to his schedule with his makeup from the last location all screwed up

hair tousled and lips swollen

thank god he didnt wear any of the official outfits off set

but when hes in bed he cant drift off without one more kissing session, and some more touching

because who would he be if he wasnt a religiously guilty sex-driving machine that ended up not being very sex driven at all?

unless he was, when he wanted to be

but, alas, when he didnt want to be he would make you breakfast

and shower when he woke up, to keep his pristine skin and hair from falling out

he needs another kiss when you wake up

how else would he keep the smile on his face

he hates working when he cant bring you

but when he can its usually to concerts

nobody else knows why he looks at one section for the whole concert except for you

and you blush every time he sings want and wont stop looking at you in the eyes, yes he knows what hes doing

he always tries to get you backstage afterwards

but you reject him since you know the media will catch you

and then youd become more than the cover up that you visit him so much because youre his housekeeper

what kind of housekeeper goes backstage at concerts to see him afterwards

some housekeeper that must be

he'll get impatient after a while though and end up in your hotel room even though euisu said no

all tangled in covers with you

infatuated by your beauty, tracing shapes all over your skin and giving you infinite amounts of kisses

hes such a cheesy little shit

but both of you know thats how it goes even if hes looking at you telling you that hes your toy in the middle of a concert

taemin always says i love you

because its all he ever thinks about

his mind is you you you

and maybe some kkoong too

because he always cuddles up with her

and starts vlives when youre in the other room

one too many times youve wondered who hes talking to and almost blew it

and hell apologize after for not warning you

but we all know hes going to do it again

because thats just how he is

in his stupid, lovable, little shit form that he is

and you love every part of him because of it

even when you fight

hes always first to apologize but expects an apology in return

because hes not the only one who did wrong

but of course he forgives quickly

and ends up kissing you

and making you an omelet or kimchi stew

because he is lovable, lovable taemin, whom you can never take your mind or eyes off of, even when you try

yall that was so cute for me to write my brain is melting in cute taemin rn, i hope you enjoyed this. its my first time writing in bullets though so i hope its okay TT

~ ryse

[skzhocomments]

In the Dark - Choi Minho SHINee Fanfic - Story Masterlist

Pairing: Minho (of SHINee) x OC (name: Jieun)

Genre: non-idol AU, single dad trope, prostitution, angst, romance, fluff, mature

Word Count: ~60k

Warnings: mature, swearing, feelings of hopelessness, angst, depression, death, crying, explicit sexual content, and others.

This is just a story that doesn’t describe SHINee members' true characters in any way. It’s just a product of my imagination and should be treated as such.

This story is also on Wattpad (click here) and AO3 (click here)

A/N: As any other writer out there, I would appreciate reblogs and your comments on this story. Please let me know if you enjoyed it, and most importantly, have fun!

---

Summary:

inthedark.com A site that promises to fulfil each and every wild fantasy you've ever had in complete darkness and, most importantly, in complete anonymity. Privacy is ensured for all parties involved, be it customer or prostitute. So, how exactly would this site change the life trajectory of a single dad and a mere elementary school teacher? Read and find out in my SHINee Minho fanfic titled 'In the Dark'!

---

The story and cover are original and my property. Any similarities to other stories are purely coincidental. Jieun, the protagonist, is a made-up character.

SHINee members or any other famous people mentioned along this story DO NOT represent their true character in any way, they are simply mentioned in order to provide a visual representation for the readers. Their personas obviously have nothing to do with their true personalities. They're just characters I've created for this story, so please don't take this too seriously.

Mature content ahead. Lots of trigger warnings apply, so please read carefully.

---

18+

©storminsidemycore

---

Chapter 1 - inthedark.com - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 2 - Take my breath away - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 3 - Always tired, but never of you - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 4 - Uncanny resemblance - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 5 - Babysitter duty - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 6 - The wine talking - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 7 - When our lips touch - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 8 - Letting go - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 9 - The virus - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 10 - Falling apart - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 11 - All fell down - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 12 - Somewhere I belong - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 13 - A night to remember - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 14 - A family - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

Chapter 15 - A happy forever (Final Chapter) - Tumblr + Wattpad + AO3

---

Thank you so much for reading.

Hope you enjoyed it!

Love,

Storm

---

Masterlist

[dibidibifiction]

Give Me A Hug

[on-going series]

TRIGGER WARNINGS: smut, violence, physical abuse, trauma, alcohol

PAIRING: Taemin x Female Reader

CATEGORY: Romance

POV: First person

Number of chapters: 17 (incomplete) Word count per chapter: 1k-2.3k

DISCLAIMER: This is a work of fiction made for the personal entertainment of readers. The writer does not ever intend to offend her readers nor does she aim to spread false information about anyone so as to pay any disrespect to the real-life persons on whom the characters are based. She also does not claim ownership of any of the images that are being used.

SYNOPSIS: Y is gradually accepting all the scars on her body. Despite her past and self-doubts, she has come to be surrounded by people who love her and believe in her. Jonghyun, her best friend for years, has helped her slowly get back on her feet, finding her resuming her career in fashion and beauty. After leaving her abusive husband, she didn’t think she could be good enough for that path nor could she trust and love again. But let’s see how her life turns around as Taemin comes into her life.

general masterlist

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3 NEW!

Chapter 4 NEW!

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12 (smut)

Chapter 13 (male nudity)

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

. . .

more SHINee fanfictions

[darl-ingfics]

Sicktember Day 21: ALT - Flushed Cheeks

Fandom: SHINee

Sickie: Kibum (fever, broken heart)

Caregiver(s): Jinki

Word Count: 1,455

Notes: Heavily based on Kelsea Ballerini's 'the way i used to.' I've been SO into her music lately, and might be writing a few drabbles based on her songs... but this one hit first cause this song is 🔥 ALSO, I'm still not sure how I feel about writing idols in romantic relationships, so this one very vaguely references a past relationship with an unspecified ex. Used 'them' for the ex cause I don't want to assume anything here, but needed to write a heartbreak plot line.

At exactly 2:15am on the dot, Jinki woke up to the sound of his phone crashing to the floor, the vibrations from in an incoming call sending it over the edge of his nightstand. Jinki snapped awake, scrambling for the phone, bleary eyes squinting at screen. Minho. “Hello?”

“Hyung? I’m worried about Kibum.” Minho wasted no time, his voice dead serious. Jinki sat up, rubbing at his eyes to wake himself up faster. “He’d been texting me almost non stop. Real nonsensical things, probably voice to text. But since I’m in L.A., I can’t…” Jinki could practically hear him pinching the bridge of his nose in worry. “Can you please go check on him?”

“Of course.” 

“Thank you. 

*

“Kibum?” Jinki called as he closed the door behind him. It had taken him half an hour to roll out of bed, look presentable enough in case he got pulled over or had to take Kibum to the hospital or something, and drive over to his friend’s apartment. He’d called Kibum three times and texted him to say he was on his way over, but had received no response. Much like now. Thankfully, he had a spare key to get in. “Kibum!” he tried again. Still nothing, except footsteps and murmuring from deeper in the house. Sighing, Jinki toed off his shoes and followed the sounds down the hallway until he found his friend. 

Kibum was pacing back and forth in his living room, fingers tapping on his lower lip as his eyes moved rapidly through space. A notebook and several writing instruments were strewn about the coffee table, coupled with a bottle of tequila and a shot glass, which was currently laying on its side. Kibum’s phone was precariously placed at the very edge of the coffee table. 

“Kibum?”

The younger man startled at Jinki’s voice, having just noticed him for the first time. His hand flew to his chest. “Jinki, what the fuck? When did you get here?”

“Just now. Minho called me. He’s worried sick about you.”

Kibum blinked, eyebrows furrowing in confusion. “Minho? He’s in California…”

“Yeah, which is why he called me. He said you’ve been sending him some pretty alarming messages?” Kibum frowned, eyes shifting to his phone. His movements were uncharacteristically jerky as he grabbed the device, and began tapping the screen. His face crumpled into more confusion as he scrolled. “What’s… all this?”

Kibum looked up from the phone with wide eyes, as if seeing the mess of his living room for the first time. “Writing.” He knelt down in front of the notebook, fingers caressing the page. 

“Writing what?” Jinki bit his lip, observing Kibum closely. The younger man looked dazed, eyes glassy and cheeks flushed, fingers fidgeting endlessly.

“A song.” 

Jinki had seen Kibum in a writing trance before, but he’d never seen him like this. The pacing, the finger tapping, that was normal. The shaking? The listlessness? That was off. And the drinking… Jinki nodded to himself, something clicking in his brain. He needed to keep Kibum talking. “Why are you writing a song now? It’s 3am!” 

Kibum shrugged. “When the muse awakens, one must heed its call.” His voice trailed off as he scrambled for a pencil and scribbled something in the notebook. 

Jinki shook his head, moving closer to his friend. Kibum flinched, instinctively covering most of the paper with his elbow. He seemed to believe Jinki hadn’t noticed that. So the elder let him, simply nodding towards the bottle. “What’cha drinkin’?”

Kibum’s eyes assessed the tequila. He shrugged. “Not really sure. Just needed something to help the words flow…”

“You know…” Jinki settled onto his knees next to Kibum. The younger man’s body tensed, and he didn’t turn to acknowledge Jinki joining him on the floor. “You’ve always had a knack for writing lyrics. You’ve never mentioned needing help with ‘flow’ or anything. In fact, I thought you said that drinking while writing actually slows down your process…”

“Well, yeah, most of the time it does but, sometimes it…”

“Except.” Kibum’s lips snapped shut. He still refused to meet Jinki’s eyes despite the elder staring at him straight on. “Except when you’re writing about a break up.” Kibum’s eyes could have burned a hole in his table. Jinki let the tense silence carry on for a few heartbeats. “Bummie, are you thinking about them again?” 

Kibum sat still as a statue. Jinki watched him worriedly, observing each inhale and exhale, the beads of sweat at his hairline. He saw Kibum’s eyes move to his phone, and sensed what was about to happen before Kibum could move, snatching the phone up himself. 

“HEY!” Kibum grasped at Jinki’s back as the leader swiveled away from him, unlocking Kibum’s phone and clicking into his messages. Sure enough, the last string of texts Kibum had sent to Minho were all about them. I miss them, Minho. think I fucked up… I should text them, right? It’s been so long. Just to check in. It’s just a phone call? That’s nothing. It was a mistake… all of it. They’ve posted pictures with the same person on Instagram FIVE times recently!!! That doesn’t mean anything, right? I should call…

“Hyung, noooo…” Kibum whined. His hands, buried in Jinki’s shirt stopped pulling backwards, and started pulling down instead. Jinki peeked over his shoulder, watching Kibum’s fingers detach from his shirt as he slumped face first to the floor. 

“Oh, baby.” Jinki shifted around, petting Kibum’s hair. “It’s okay, sweetheart…”

“NO! It’s NOT okay!” Kibum cried into the floor. “They’re in love with SOMEONE ELSE! And it’s NOT FAIR!”

“You don’t know that…”

“I do know! Why else would they have broken up with me?!”

“Sometimes people just aren’t meant to be, Ki…”

“We WERE, I KNOW IT!”

“If that was true, then they wouldn’t have hurt you like this. You loved them so, much, and I know how painful that is to let go of…”

“But they aren’t in love with ME!” A gasping sob. “Why didn’t they love me?!”

Jinki clicked his tongue, his hand moving to rub at Kibum’s shoulders. The younger man crawled forehead, head falling into Jinki’s lap. “Bummie, it’s not your fault. They weren’t your person, and that just means that somewhere out there…”

“Oh, spare me all that ‘other fish in the sea’ bullshit.” Kibum sniffled sharply, rubbing at his eyes. “I don’t want another fish. I want to be their fish.”

“Kibum, come on. You’re not the only one who’s had their heart broken before…”

The younger man scoffed. “Sure, sure. But you don’t get it. You weren’t… this relationship was…” His face screwed shut, a fist placed against his forehead. “Fuck, I loved them, Jinki. I love them. I don’t think I’ve ever loved someone before, not like this.” His eyes turned up at that, tearstained cheeks and all staring at Jinki with such vulnerability the older man felt his own eyes start to sting. 

“I’m so sorry, Kibum. You deserve someone who loves as fiercely as you love them.” Jinki traced a finger down Kibum’s cheek. He paused. Placed his finger back on Kibum’s cheekbone. Then placed his palm on the younger man’s forehead. “Bummie, how long have you had a fever?”

Kibum shrugged. “Maybe two days?”

“Two days?”

Kibum shrugged again. “It’s just work stress…”

“A fever’s never ‘just’ anything. No wonder you’re backsliding again…” Jinki cupped both of Kibum’s cheeks, leaning over him upside down. “Baby, just call me next time. Then we don’t need to go through the pain of recollecting the ex.”

Kibum pouted his lips. “I’m sorry?”

Jinki rolled his eyes. He then very gently pushed at Kibum’s shoulders to sit him up, before standing up himself and holding out his hands. “Come on. Let’s get you to bed.”

Kibum took Jinki’s hands and let himself be pulled to his feet. “Are you sure we can’t call them, though? Just to see if…”

“Nope. No calling. The rules were clear when we made them a month ago.”

Kibum pouted. “Minho would let me call…”

“Oh sweetheart, you are so lucky I’m here and not Minho.” Even in his semi-delirious state, Kibum knew to immediately close his mouth. Even though Jinki’s voice was still light, a bright smile still on his lips, anyone who knew him well could see that he was at the edge of his seemingly infinite patience. Honestly, a part of Kibum understood; Jinki was only trying to protect him. Which was why Kibum allowed himself to be led back to his room and cared for by his worried hyung. Because, in the end, even if he was single, he knew what love looked like. He was loved. Very, very loved.

[lxvemaze]

instagram stories with bf! minho!

a/n: i really want to start writing more for underrated groups/groups without a lot of fic, like shinee! i know what it's like to be in a fandom without a lot of fic, so hopefully, ya'll enjoy these :)

onew, jonghyun, key, minho, taemin

[mykoreanlove]

new heights

Back in the days Taemin used to date a lot of girls that were easy - easy to impress, easy to have and easy to manipulate.

They were infatuated with him, blatantly oblivious to his real character, solely obsessed with his idol persona.

He would toy with them, but none of them had what it took for him to fall in love.

He’d use them as he pleased.

Used them from the back, front, upside down, standing, sitting, in public or behind closed doors but it was always him asserting dominance, remaining in control.

Until you showed up.

Blowjobs were a risky thing for him, giving up control and letting you lead was terrifying to him.

Terrifyingly sexy.

„Baby, why are you on your knees?“

He was pushed against the wall, nowhere left to go. Taemin looked down and watched you, sat on your knees looking up to him, batting your lashes at him.

„Is that a problem, Tae Tae?“, you purred seductively.

He shook his head and watched your fingers glide over his legs - starting with the shins and going up to his thighs.

His heart started beating faster, suddenly he was hyper aware of the room‘s hotness.

Taemin placed his hands on your head, guiding you, trying to regain some control but you hissed at him instantly.

„Arms up, Taemin“, you commanded sternly.

He obliged, putting his arms up as if he had been caught by the police.

„Good boy“, you praised him proudly.

Your fingers traced further north, playing with the buttons on his pants. They were silver and cold to the touch.

You looked up at him again and asked innocently: „May I?“

God, how could he deny you?

Your beautiful eyes were glistening with desire, full of longing for him. He watched you lick your lips in anticipation, ready to devour him.

Taemin nodded silently, still pressed to the wall. He watched you unzip his pants and pull them down, admiring the impressive bulge that had formed underneath his boxers.

His heart was beating like a drum, his ears were ringing, he could hardly hear anything anymore.

Swiftly, you pulled down his boxers and were taken aback by his cock - massively throbbing for you.

„Fuck Taemin, it’s a shame you rarely let me give you head. Your cock is screaming for me, look at this.“, you mused.

In this moment he had to agree, giving up control more often may not be that bad after all.

You gave him one final look, batting your doll eyes at him before you took him all in, instantly moaning in pleasure.

Taemin‘s eyes rolled back, surrendering to this sensation.

You had trouble fitting all of him in your mouth but luckily you had hands to help, giving him a mixture of the wetness of your mouth and the force of your hands.

„Fuck“, he moaned under his breath.

You wanted this so badly, wanted to let him know how much you desired him.

His chest was heaving heavier, as he was already close.

„I want to touch you, y/n“, he whispered as he watched you from above.

You met his gaze and ignited an even bigger fire within him, seeing you sucking on his dick did a number on his ego.

Taemin lovingly placed his hands around your face, cupping you as you sucked harder.

You were good at this, oh absolutely, but it was not the touch of your plush lips around his cock or your tongue swirling around his glans or the poking against your throat, no, it were your eyes that drove him over the edge.

Your beautiful eyes that were filled with desire, longing and love for only him. Those eyes that never lied, always declaring the truth were the ones that made him cum in your mouth.

Taemin tasted heavenly, the perfect mixture of salty and sweet.

You sucked him off, garnering the last drop before you let go of him happily.

Before you could stand up he got down on his knees and crashed his lips onto yours, forcefully tasting himself on you.

„Thank you, baby“, he huffed out as he pressed his forehead against yours.

„For what?“

He chuckled sweetly.

„For taking me to new heights, y/n.“

[itstheoneshot]

Kinktober Day 11

Shower Sex - Onew

!dom Onew

“Come on, honey,” Jinki groans in your ear, “Take it, fucking take it.”

The mixture of sweet and filthy makes you crazy, with your body pressed up against the tiled wall of the shower, and your boyfriend behind you, cock buried balls deep in your cunt, your head is spinning.

“Feels so good, oppa,” You whimper, as he thrusts into you hard enough to lift your feet off the ground, “More, harder, fuck me harder.”

You try to remember how you got here, as intimacy between you two had been so uncommon as of late, your conflicting schedules caused a disruption in your lives, and a disconnect in your relationship. Neither of you wanted things to end, you had been together for years, but there was something that you had been unable to vocalise.

This had changed suddenly, it seems, after a pointless fight that you had started, when he came home from work later than he had told you he was going to. It had been tense in the morning, with a disinterested promise to be home on time today, with an agreement to go out for dinner and try and enjoy yourselves before returning to another full week of work for you starting tomorrow. You gave up two hours after he had said he would be back, calling the restaurant to cancel your reservation just as it was due to start. You were in the bathroom getting undressed when you heard the front door open and you felt your body tense up with anger, dropping everything you were doing to meet him in the hallway with a scowl on your face.

“Am I really that unimportant?” You start, not even bothering to greet him, “Why do you care so little?”

Jinki rolled his eyes at that point, “What is your problem? I got held back.”

You were livid now, seething, really, “So you forgot our date? Or were you off fucking someone else?”

It is true that you had been convinced of this for who knows how long, with such little time spent together, you were sure he would have done so if he wanted to, and with how little he seemed to want you, it was hard to believe otherwise.

“You have got to be fucking kidding me,” He spits back, though you are not sure which of the two points he was addressing, “Do you really think so lowly of me?”

It caught you off guard, as he stepped toward you, and you found yourself stepping away, a little bit frightened, a little bit regretful, but for some reason still drawn to him, craving the attention that he is finally giving you. You step further back just for him to chase you, backed against the bathroom door, unable to get away from him now.

“There is nobody else,” He tells you while staring deep into your eyes, you are unable to look away, and you know he is telling the truth, “It’s only you, like I promised.”

When Jinki kisses you suddenly, without warning or any sort of premonition, you falter, falling apart and into him, desperately clinging to his shirt as if it were your lifeline, holding onto him as he opens the door behind you to push you into the room that you had only left because he had come home. Half of your clothes are already scattered on the floor from when you had begun to undress before he got home. His clothes soon end up amongst them, as desire overtakes you both, as the need to be on him, the need to be in you, controls your minds and your bodies.

It takes too long for the water to warm up under the showerhead, and your body is covered in goosebumps as the cold water washes over you both, but neither of you seem to notice, too busy getting you prepared, fingers deep inside you as you leave marks on his neck, obvious and unable to be hidden, though you couldn't care less. You wanted everyone to know that he is taken, that he is yours, and to back away and let him be, yours and yours only.

“Never doubt me again,” Jinki warns you, fingers knotted in your hair to tug your neck back so that you can look at him behind you as he destroys your body, “You know that I only ever have eyes for you, it is you or it is no one.”

You are dizzy, fucked out and senseless, orgasm after orgasm racks through your body, his abnormally large cock stretching you out makes you realise even more how long it had been, and how you too had eyes for him and him only, nobody could work your body, and your heart, like he always does, even if it is months apart.

“I won’t,” You promise, words muffled under the running water, “Just don’t make me wait this long ever again, I need you, I need you!”

Your confession spurs him on, admittance to how down bad you are for him only urges him to remind you that he feels exactly the same way. This change of job had almost broken what you had worked so hard to build, but those feelings in your subconscious never changed, he was everything to you, and you were all that he needed, too.

“Baby,” He purrs, releasing your hair to gently caress your throat instead, as your cheek is pressed up against the tile, he takes extra care to make sure you do not hit your head with the force in which he fucks you in, “I’m gonna come, are you ready to take it?”

The consent is hot as fuck, too, the way he cares for you even when he fucks you so filthy has you nodding eagerly, repeated pleas and cries for him to defile you, to leave his mark in the same way that you left yours all over his skin with bites and scratches, you need him to fill you up, you are not whole until he does this, you feel complete when he fills your cunt with his seed.

“Good girl,” He praises you as he releases, his moans are melodic and beautiful, quite the opposite of your pathetic cries of his name, “All mine, all mine, all mine.”

———

Kinktober 2024 Masterlist

[kiestrokes]

Sorry I forced you to be my friend @chans-room 😅

[gayashawol]

𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐒𝐭𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐅𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠

Ships: Kim Kibum x Male Pastor!Y/N

Genre: Smut, Angsty (It’s kinda hurt but also comfort???)

Word Count: 4000+ words

Content Warning(s): Past Child Molestation (There’s a flashback part, but it’s not very detailed), Dealing with Trauma, Sex, Dark Religious Themes, Religious Trauma

Author’s Notes: Yes, I know I said I don’t allow any sort of rape in any of my stories, but a friend suggested me to do this sort of thing and made me realise that I’ve gone through something similar where I wanted to do something again. So pretty much, this is what the story is going. It is a bit of a weird one, but I hope I was able to convey Key’s emotions well. Also, Key is in his 20s and the Pastor is about in his 40s.

I still think about what happened, the way he touched me, the way he went about it, and even the way my parents reacted when I finally told them.

While I did feel some sort of guilt, I also had this strange feeling inside of me that would admit that I liked it. Maybe I was in denial, or maybe I was being serious. I didn’t know how to feel, or how I could go about my life without pinpointing exactly the feeling I was getting.

Nonetheless, I knew I wanted to do it again.

—

It was something I thought about for years on end, and I hadn’t been able to tell anyone. I was just ashamed, or maybe people would assume that I was lying for clout.

I knew that it was something that truly happened to me, I even had the very clothes that I wore on that day. I remembered what I ate for breakfast, what my mother was planning on making me for dinner, and even down to a couple of minutes before the incident.

I never went to therapy for my pain, nor I ever went back to church. My parents were disappointed, grounding me every time I missed one day for a week until I went. It was at that very moment that my faith was crippled.

I tend to cry when I think of my emotions, but this time was different. A part of me wanted to move on, even though I didn’t know how to. That was when I was on the phone with my parents, explaining about the pain that I’d been going through. They suggested me to go back, but I wasn’t sure.

My parents hated the fact that I was an atheist. The amount of screaming matches I had to go through, just because they wanted to force the bible on me. Every single time I tell them to stop, they get louder and louder. I had no power over them, and I would feel trapped within myself.

However, this was the first time I agreed with them. I was in my 20s, surely he would change. I shook my head, before cutting off to process exactly what I was about to do.

I planned my trip to my hometown, packing up clothes I would know they would approve. I knew I had to look as manly as possible, especially when I go to church. I took in a crisped grey suit and pants, with a bow on them.

A couple of days later, I finally made that trip and was at the front door of my parents’ house. They seemed so happy to see me upon opening and letting me in, but the facade broke away, and their strictness was back.

“Kibum, if you’re staying here, you will need to go to church with us every Sunday.” I sighed, face-palming while contemplating why I thought it would be a good idea to come back home. I knew I’d only be here for a week, but just the memories coming back made it ten times worse.

I saw my childhood room, thinking about all the times I cried alone in my bed that day. I just wish I could speak to my past self and comfort him. Everything here was filled with horrible thoughts, and not even the TV was safe. The amount of Christian content that I had to watch was concerning. I used to be made fun of at school for not watching shows that all the kids were watching simply because it wasn’t allowed.

I saw a picture of my younger self, in a suit ready to go to church. Right next to it, there was another picture of me, but I was being baptised. It was the happiest day of my life. I thought that I was going to love Jesus forever and be a Christian for the rest of my life. Sadly, that wouldn’t be the case.

I woke up to my parents knocking on my door to get ready to go to church. I was very nervous, yet I put on a brave face as I took a shower to clear my mind. Maybe, this was going to be fine, right?

When I got ready to go into the car, I saw my father waiting outside while my mother walked slowly down the stairs. We didn’t live that far from our local church, but my parents always insisted on walking together like a family. I never understood that, even now as an adult.

I was finally at the place where I feared, the hall. Everyone was walking in, chatting to one and another while I sat alone. Seeing how “lonely” I looked according to my mother, as she was chatting to one of my childhood friends, she introduced me to him, causing me to awkwardly wave my hand as the both of them stared in my direction.

I’ve been an adult for some time now, and even listening to the pastor speaking felt like a bore. But then, he stared at me — and we locked eyes for a whole second before turning back to the crowd, and the service suddenly got somewhat interesting. He seemed happier now that I was here, which felt sweet on its own but weird. How did he know who I was even though I was 10 when I last saw him?

My mind was puzzling in my head, and before I could even process what just happened, the church was over. I didn’t even realise the time until my mother tapped me on the shoulder for food.

I sat down at a table alone, not wanting to sit next to my parents. I had a plate full of rice, bulgogi and kimchi, and ate slowly but steadily. As I was just forgetting about what just happened, I saw Pastor Y/N walking towards me. My eyes widened, and I was still in shock by the time he reached me.

“Is this seat free?” He asked. I shook my head and he sat by me. He still had the same scent 10 years later. He hasn’t even changed a thing at all! As a matter of fact, he looked even better!

“Kibum… you’ve grown so much! I’m so glad you decided to come by today!” He seemed polite in nature, and didn’t seem to have any malicious intentions. I mean, it was normal for him to go up to people and speak to them.

But then, the incident started playing in my head. I stood as still as a rock, looking down so he couldn’t see me. I wanted to ask but was nervous. What if he wasn’t the same guy anymore? Surely he could do me one last time…

“Hey, Kibum… can I invite you to dinner tomorrow?” I quickly agreed, nothing trying to take time to think about what I was getting myself into.

Tomorrow felt like a breeze, I didn’t even remember what I did when I was going home. I did remember my mother pulling me into a corner away from my father just to ask me if Pastor Y/N did anything to me. I kept quiet, shaking my head as I looked back at Mother to see if my answer was verified.

“I saw him chatting to you today. He told me he misses you after all these years, and wants to see you in Church more. He could help you build your relationship with God again.” I tried not to roll my eyes for the 8th time, but I wanted to keep the lies going… unless I wasn’t.

I was invited to come for dinner at Pastor Y/N’s. I knew it was something I didn’t want to share with my parents, as I knew that it would come with something more than just two consenting adults meeting in a house.

That very night, I made sure to buy some condoms and lube to bring with me in case anything escalated. I planned out an outfit that seemed masculine enough so he wouldn’t raise an eyebrow at me — even though I was sure that he knew for a fact that I was not a heterosexual man.

I fell asleep, seeing the man that I always dreamed of being close to — but was unsure how to feel about it. As an adult, I felt like a kid again. He held my hand like he was crossing the road, reminding me to look both ways before walking. I saw the road form around me, seeing each sparkle and star create the world around us, seeing familiar people appearing one by one.

It was then that I was brought into the Church, people were singing while praying at the same time. There were too many people, so Pastor Y/N took me backstage where the changing rooms were. At that point, my heart started pounding. This was the moment that it happened, his hand landed on my thighs so he could stroke them. His hands were rough and scratchy, they were also huge enough to cover the whole diameter of my legs from my thighs to my ankles.

My dress pants were pulled down, revealing bright blue underwear with thunderbolts on them. I’d thought he would stop right there, but he continued on and removed the very thing that was hiding my genital area. Everything was a blur after that, having my head facing the wall and feeling the action happening from my rear end.

I woke up almost feeling like I wanted to cry, so I lay there at 5 am while waiting for me to fall back to sleep. I then felt something hard underneath my pants, which meant that I had a wet dream as well.

This was how it was for over a decade. I get flashback dreams, I wake up crying, I get hard, I masturbate, I fall back to sleep. It never failed me. It remained the same ever since. I wasn’t sure if it was because of how I process things, but everyone that I told was quick to say how unnatural it was for me to act the way I did.

I woke up with my pants still down, unable to recall what happened last night. I got into the shower, thinking about everything I wanted to say to that man. My stomach was growling like I was hungry, but deep down inside I was a nervous wreck.

I had to awkwardly eat breakfast with my parents since my mother filled out the whole table with all sorts of fruits, a tray for the tea set and some other drinks, and bread with some sandwich toppings on another tray. All the trays that were displayed made it seem like there was way more stuff than expected. I rarely ate — only trying to take as little as possible so I could excuse myself into my room to get ready.

I sat in my room, waiting for his name to pop up on my phone. He gave me the green light, prompting me to get dressed and walk out of the house. It was noon and my parents were a bit concerned as to why I was leaving at this time. I thought of a quick lie of me walking around my childhood city as an excuse and they accepted it — surprisingly.

I ran off, walking towards a train station that would lead me to his place. He called me a couple of times to ask me if I was coming, but I was underground and had to wait until I arrived to reply to him. He picked me up at the train station, pulling me into a warm embrace which felt imitated.

“Kibum… how have you been doing? Was the journey alright?” He said in his soft voice, possibly softer than he was at the church the day before. He held my hand as we walked out of the station, walking towards what seemed to be his neighbourhood. He lived in a nice little penthouse that seemed small, but it had all the view he could have.

We entered from the entrance, before going onto the lift to the very top. He unlocked his door, opening it to showcase a very warm atmosphere that I could get at any pub or restaurant. Everywhere seemed neat but messy at the same time, while also looking expensive looking. It was a sight I didn’t want to miss, especially with the fact that every single glance was something worth noting, like the gramophone sitting at the corner of the room.

“Make yourself at home, Kibum.” He patted the couch, indicating him asking me to sit down. I eventually did, while he was searching around the room for something catching up to our conversation. “So Kibum… tell me what you have been doing ever since you left Church.”

“Well…” I started. “I moved out and so I couldn’t afford to come all the way here.” I went with the conversation, knowing that he was going to say something very cliche.

“Kibum…” He stopped what he was doing to sit next to me, with his hands on mine while they were on my lap. “Listen to me… Jesus will always love you, regardless of that.”

I didn’t know if I wanted to continue with that talk, yet it was my fault for agreeing to go to a literal pastor’s house. Sure I didn’t want to go through a whole lecture on how God is good and great for the millionth time, but a part of me just wants to see what would happen… between us.

“I always felt like I had to go every Sunday… but the moment I couldn’t… I feel fake.” I lied, even giving him the puppy eyes that I mastered since I was a kid.

“Kibum, don’t say that…” I felt his hand on my back, the adrenaline of the conversation was causing me to go on and keep the lie going. “I always knew your love for Jesus is real, even since you were a boy.”

He was starting to get close to me, having his other hand stroking my crotch area. I was horrified, but I was also excited that I was going to get with Pastor Y/N again after all these years of craving for his touch.

“Kibum…” He was checking me off through my clothes, and I could see a small spark in his eyes. He saw something that he was looking for, and that was me. My young body that he wanted to use again. “…Please… may I pray for you?”

Suddenly, my mind went blank, unsure how to feel or to respond. Was he going to use me again, or was this bait created by my imagination which was so desperate that I generated my suffering by my thoughts?

After all the thoughts that ran through my mind, I agreed, holding both of my hands while we faced each other. His eyes closed, and so did mine. This used to be my everything as a child, being able to picture God clearly with his white-washed face and his gown. Nowadays, I see nothing. It was impossible to convince myself to see otherwise.

“Father in heaven, I thank you for being brother Kibum back into the Church.“ He started praying, in which he started becoming more preachy as every sentence occurred.

I felt his every nudge, every poke, and all the attempts he made to touch me in any way or form. He even managed to place his hand on my thighs while it was spread apart, causing me to be unable to close it.

He was getting deep into his prayer, and I was feeling slightly uncomfortable, but excited at the same time. This was what I was waiting for, or at least that was what I thought I needed. I wasn’t sure how to feel. Did I accomplish anything? Did I make things worse? Oh god… did I make anything worse?

But then… he slipped his hand under my pants, and all those thoughts left my mind.

It was just pure… silence. I was horny, I needed this, and I wanted this. It was exactly what I was looking for at this very moment… someone using me for their benefit. That was my guilty pleasure.

“Wow… your penis barely has changed!” Pastor Y/N went close to me, and I gulped as loudly as I felt like a cartoon character. I could feel that lust in his eyes, doing something that he shouldn’t have.

Then… his lips touched mine. There was no noise, just the sound of smooches and hums in between. He laid me down on the couch, kissing me more like I was a drug. He wasn’t afraid to use his tongue, which made him look attractive to me.

He pulled out, looking directly at me. “I know you’re a homosexual, Kibum.” That threw me off guard, but I owned my identity, so I claimed it as it was. He told me that we could pray again later, but he wanted to feel my gorgeous boy body.

Boy body…? What does he mean by that? Why would he exclaim that my body was one of a boy? Could it be that he still sees me as the kid he used? Either way, my vision of myself was still that young me, but with more clarity and less confusion. With my big age, I would’ve learned how to say stop. Nonetheless, it has been locked away in a treasure chest, and thrown out the window.

I didn’t feel a single guilt throughout all of it. He kept stripping off my clothes, showing my bare body to him, feeling our skin against each other’s. I knew it was Pastor Y/N, but a part of me was starting to gain some sort of attraction to him.

It was like… he wasn’t a Pastor to me… he was a childhood crush.

“Mmm yes… You’ve always been such a good boy…” He caressed my cheeks, while I felt his finger rubbing the lip of my anus.

“I’ll go and get the lube… I’ll be right back.” He kisses me on the forehead, before walking away to his room. I looked down to see my clothes on the floor, including my boxers that I had worn when it happened to me. I kept it after all this time since no matter how many times I tried to wash them, it still smelt like him…

Wait… why did I decide that this was a good idea? I mean, I knew I needed to get over it eventually, but was I doing too much?

It was a line that I didn’t know existed — at least for me anyway. I didn’t see a problem having sex with Pastor Y/N. In fact, it was my dream to have sex with him as an adult now that I know what he has done to me. Unfortunately for me, the fear and guilt came back to bite me in the ass, and now I was unsure of what would be the right choice for me. I felt like a mom nagging to myself and hating it because I had to wash the dishes.

Well, I already went this far so it would be far too late for me to give it up and go home. The least I could do would be to suck his cock and call it a day.

“Kibum, do you want to come to the bedroom?” He called me, to which I immediately complied regardless of any prior thoughts. I walked over to his room, where I saw a very neat room with a comfortable-looking bed and antique-looking pieces of furniture with fake plants around them.

“Come and sit here! I won’t hurt you!” My body began to vibrate, but was unsure whether it was a bad thing or not. But either way, I crawled over to him, with my butt facing him. I could tell it aroused him since he would open my butt cheeks so he would lick me there. Or… at least he would’ve due to my butt plug was in the way.

“I see you’re prepared for me, Kibum! Should I remove that for you?” I nodded my head quickly, and he did what he needed to do. He slowly pulled out my plug, in which I felt everything from the stretching to the rubbing on my prostate. When it was out, I could feel cold air going inside. That stopped when he put his warm fingers inside of me.

It… did feel good, and the way he was very gentle with me this time made me convinced that he might be in love with me. From the way he would lick me, to the type of treatment he was giving me. I knew that it wasn’t something that I wanted to take away from myself.

It was time for him to go inside me, and I opted to go into a missionary position so I could see him the whole time. My legs had to go all the way up to my shoulders, but it was still enjoyable. The moment he went inside, my moans started. He still felt very big inside, just like how it was before. The way he grabbed my legs when he wanted to go faster was something that was unexplainable.

“Mmm… you’re so amazing, Kibum. You’re so tight… you’ve always been tight… that amazing boy hole…” I didn’t take notice of what he said, but the way he gave me praise overpowered any outright creepy comment he might’ve said during the session.

His grunts were something I’d hear in a hentai. If anyone heard him for the first time, they would’ve assumed that he was a toxic top, when he was really a nice person who looked out for his bottoms. Meanwhile, I sounded like I was meowing. My voice may go from low to high, slow to fast, and quiet to loud very quickly. I could also be overstimulated, so curling into a ball would be something I’d do. A typical bottom.

The way he thrusts inside was something I could explain in detail. I could feel it every time he went deep, so much that we grunted at the same time. But when he goes faster, that would be when we go out of sync and I get crazier.

“Ahhh yes… your moans are so cute, Kibum…” I just love it when he says his name. It would always gives me goosebumps whenever he reminds me of my presence and how much it drives him insane.

I want this feeling to last forever, and I want it to be with him. He seemed so into me, that I forget about everything that happened before that very moment. It felt like this was a hookup date and that I met him on a gay dating app. In fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if he has been on there for at least once. And even if he had sex with other boys like me, somehow he realised that I was the boy he needed.

He needed me more than anything. And I wanted him too.

“Yes…yes… I’m about to cum…” I begged him to place his manhood in my mouth, and he did just that. His white juices went all over my face while some went into my mouth.

He laid me down onto the bed, making me relax beside him. He was still cuddling me while he went soft. He kissed me on the cheek, before falling asleep. I glanced around the room like a lost child, and my sense of my mind slowly started coming back. A part of me couldn’t believe I agreed to have sex with Pastor Y/N, while at the same time, I was glad I did.

I don’t know… but I’d say that it was this strange feeling that always gets to me whenever I look back at this very moment.

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dividers by @cafekitsune